Have you heard this expression - “Let Go of What Doesn’t Serve You”? Today, we’re going to dive into this concept and discuss exactly what that means and why it’s important. If you’re a person who has something that’s disrupting your peace, causing you turmoil or is just generally, completely annoying, this post is for you. ⬇️
Life is a journey. During childhood, we learn to interact with others on the playground and share our favourite toys. Soon after, we moved into young adulthood with its vast emotional attachments and desire for independence. Next, we landed into full-blow adulthood with all the trimmings – jobs, relationships, maybe kids and a mortgage, and everyone’s favourite - debt. Adulthood looked like so much more fun from the view of childhood, didn’t it? 🥴 In each stage, we have relationships and belongings that we love and others that we don't necessarily need. Finally, you find yourself old and wondering what in the world happened?! The key is learning to let go of what doesn't serve you and keep what does.
Awesome. So What Does it MEAN?!
The phrase is across the internet, but what does it mean and how can you apply it to your circumstances? It all begins by understanding what the term “serve” means. Once you know that, you are in a fantastic position to release and hold only what makes a quality life. So here it is…
The Definition of Serve: Generally speaking, to serve is to be useful or to be of use. Your server at your favourite restaurant is of service when they bring you that delectable platter of food you've been craving.
How Do I Know if Something Doesn’t Serve Me?
Well this will be different for everyone, but it will always have one thing in common - it causes your emotional or mental disruption and takes away your peace. Pay attention to the things that make you doubt who you are or who you want to become. Think of those items or relationships that drain you mentally, emotionally, and physically.
• You might think of these things in categories:
Internal: This category includes your belief system, values, goals, duties, and obligations. For example, if you are a member of the LGBTQ+ community but your religion tells you that being gay is a sin, it may be to review if your belief system is adding joy or turmoil to your life.
Behavioural: What habits, hobbies, commitments, or other pursuits are monopolizing your time? If your pursuit of rock climbing continuously lands you in the hospital, it could be time to reevaluate the pros and cons of this exciting hobby.
Physical: This is anything around you, from the constant clutter in your home to the vacation house you never use because you have to work all of the time to afford it. Do you have a room full of outdated toys that the kids will never use again (no, just me?)? Get rid of it already - it’s taking up valuable real estate in your home (that top dollar advice was for me as much as it was for you!). 🙈
People: You might find this the most challenging category because it could mean looking at relationships. There are also the roles you hold, groups you are part of, and connections you've made. Are these people/relationships/roles supportive or toxic? Do they build you up or tear you down? Sometimes, it’s just time to be honest with ourselves about these things
Ok, So Where do I Start with All of This?
It is helpful to start with a brainstorming session. Go through each category one at a time, and decide which things are causing you the most grief and/or turmoil. Then it will be time to reflect on how you could find peace with each of these things. That could mean finding a sustainable schedule for your hobbies, donating the room full of toys (yes, that’s for me again 😬), or establishing some much needed boundaries with a loved one. Change is not always easy, but it is so important to create a habit of repairing or learning to let go of the people, items, or emotions that steal your peace and prevent you from being your best self.
Why is it so Important To Let Go of What Doesn't Serve us?
Throughout life, we experience situations that leave a lasting mark. We accumulate items that bring us joy or serve a particular service. There comes a time when you reach a fork in the road toward your personal growth. You can take one lane, and everything stays the same. You have the same job, friends, and routines (this is sometimes great, and sometimes not). The other path takes you on a new adventure with possibly new friends, an exciting new business venture, or other opportunities. However, it comes at a price…you must let go of things that no longer serve you. You may understand what that means, but do you know why it is vital to your growth?
The Truth is, Letting Go of What No Longer Serves Us Is Critical to Our Well-Being!
Choosing what to let go of looks different to each of us. It may mean letting go of clutter, a horrible job situation, or a previously valued relationship. Each case has different levels of difficulty, but there are many ways that our well-being benefits from letting go. Let’s take a look more closely…
When we let go of things that no longer serve us;
1. We regain emotional energy. If one of the things you need to let go of is a grudge, then you know the amount of energy you have spent in anger and hurt. But to what end? You may have inadvertently pushed away friends and family while living in your pain. Stop the energy-suck by forgiving the culprit and moving on to better things. It doesn’t need mean signing up for further toxicity, it just means leaving the pain and anger in the last chapter and moving on to the next, without them
2. You regain your identity. A painful relationship may leave you questioning who you are. Letting go of toxic relationships allows you to rediscover who you are and dream about what you'd like to do with your future.
3. You open the opportunity for change. Keeping yourself tied to the same job because of fear prevents you from jumping on opportunities to get that new career or start the business you’ve always dreamed of. Let go of the fear and embrace the possibilities.
4. You rediscover your joy. When you dread going to your job or going out to dinner with your critical in-laws, you have lost your happiness. It may be time to relook at your career choices or find ways to limit contact with your extended family.
5. You regain focus. In our distracted society, the day-to-day stuff in our lives burdens us all. Smartphones and social media have a way of keeping us from focusing on what matters. Regain your focus by putting the phone down and letting go of the need to be constantly scrolling through social media.
In the end, letting go is all about shaking of what doesn’t make us feel good and what disrupts our peace. Take a look at your life, what do you need to let go of? What could you gain by moving out with the old and making room for the new? Let us know in the comments below!
Sending strength your way,
C 💫